Monday, January 2, 2012

Looking Back to Move Forward

Day 2~A look back at 2011

I’m going to be honest I don’t want to look back because it makes me sad. I can’t say that 2011 was exactly my greatest 365 days of life. Here’s my take on things from the rear view mirror…

I began the year unemployed, I can’t say that I really made the time to just say “It’s okay Vanessa, you fucked up but it’s not the end of the world.” In the words of Donald Trump it was the first time I’d ever heard you’re fired, thankfully those weren’t the words I heard but that was basically the jist of it. The good news, it didn’t last terribly long a new opportunity presented itself and it was one of the worst decisions I made of 2011 [whew, there I said it]. Now seems like the appropriate time to say “It’s okay Vanessa, you did things your way and sometimes no matter how much planning you do, things don’t work out the way you intended.” Case in point, once I decided I was done I started looking for a new job and was presented with what I thought was a great direction to take my budding career. After an initial interview for a different position and three more for the said new one I heard the words I had been longing for, you’re hired! Next, I was turning in my resignation and counting down the days that the misery I had come to know oh so well was ending. Day one of my new gig had finally come; I looked the part, felt amazing and was ready to dive into the world of hair. First though there was a month of training to get through and at the end of that journey came a not so pleasant kick in the face. I was fired. It was like an out body experience I didn’t see it coming and for longer than I can count replayed that moment over and over and over in my head. So now I’m going to say, “Vanessa you did your best and even though you feel like the girl on bid day who doesn’t get a bid (which I’ve experienced) it’s okay, there’s something better out there for you.”

Looking back for me means forgiveness for the mistakes and missteps that I’ve made. Life is a journey filled with ups and downs all of which can only make us stronger if we let it. This is me letting it & saying “Hi 2012, I’m Vanessa and ready to live life on my own terms…fasten your seat belt.”


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