Friday, April 24, 2009

Two Pink Lines

Let me take you back to just a few days ago. It was Monday afternoon and my time on procrastinating had expired. With knots in my stomach I went to the grocery store and bought a home pregnancy test. I sat in the car and read the instructions as well as the Q&A portion. Which made me then think there is a reason they are addressing these specific questions...then I'm taken back to the sixteen year old version of myself and it all makes sense. I tinkle in a cup hold the absorbent tip in there for five seconds, replace the overcap, lay the test on a flat surface and am prepared to wait for the longest three minutes of my life. In what I'm sure is Guinness Book of World Record for fastest test result, in what I'm sure was less than a minute I was staring at two pink lines. In a frenzy, I pull out the instruction pamphlet and realize what exactly the two lines mean.

For comedic value let me share that: I kicked my cup o' pee over on the floor...GROSS! It's mine so I can't be too taken aback. Then it says what getting either one or two lines means right there on the test itself. I guess I have more of these moments to look forward to cause Monday it was anything but funny and today I can see the funniness in it all.

And from that moment I debated with myself what to do. This isn't the way I pictured this time in my life beginning. So I did the only thing that felt natural...I cried, and cried and cried some more. All I kept thinking was my life is changing forever. I talked to my mother first, who told me that she loved me and would support me in my decision. There was my best friend who "helped" me to see the pros to this: 1. my body would bounce back; 2. we could have a party. Note to self: in a moment of crisis call Candace and she'll find the positive in it :) On Tuesday, I woke up and all I could think was there is a life inside of me, how amazing. Later that evening it was confirmed, I'm having a baby and I'm about six weeks.

Then it got a wee bit bumpy when I brought DaddyWarBucks up to speed. He'll be dealt with in due time, that much I'm sure of. Which is why that's where the conversation about him begins and ends.

In the meantime, there is so much to look forward to. Top of the list is finding out whether it's a boy or girl. Up until yesterday I was definitely leaning in a certain direction as far as sex of the baby was concerned, and a part of me still is. But after a conversation with Rebecca and affirming that I would indeed be a good "boy mom." I'm truly going to be happy regardless.

mommy to be. XOXO


Fergster said...

Yay your comments work! LOL
Well I am so happy at your positive energy. Your so positive which you should be, but 9 times out 10 ladies your age aren't quite as positive. You have a loving family and great friends behind you and support you.
Your going to do a great job and it will be a fashionable lil one. lol <3

Geeky Black Girl said...

We CAN have a party. Lots of them, each year, balloons, clowns, rabbits in hats, super sweet sixteens, and magic card tricks.

Sole Sista PR said...

I love this blog lady.. as a single mother myself i know exactly how you feel.. I didn't want a girl at first.. I dont like to comb my hair ( which i why i go see my stylist weekly) so i knew I would rather have boy baby.. '

of course I was blessed with a wonderful ( now 5) bundle of joy and life has been better ever since...

Take care...