Hush Lil' Baby Don't You Cry

Cry (verb): weep and to make sad sounds. Synonym's include: bawl. blubber. boohoo. breakdown. burst into tears. choke up. complain. fret. howl. lament. let it all out. sob. turn on the waterworks. wail. yowl.

Last night was the worst I've experienced in the past fifty-seven days. Yes, I counted. I sit here tired. Wait exhausted. No even that doesn't do justice how it is I'm feeling. Depleted. Yeah there we go. I considered calling out of work this morning but then realized that peace and quite was waiting for me there. As a reward for not falling asleep and drooling all over the keyboard I took a nap. Fifty-five minutes of glorious, uninterrupted, sound, not exactly deep but deep enough z's.

My beautiful little of bundle of joy has a strong set of lungs. How one could not only cry for that long but at that level of intensity is beyond me. Of course she didn't cry herself to sleep. I'm starting to think that's just a myth because Elle is a bonafide master of crying just enough not to exhaust herself. The way her bottom lip curls under is absolutely adorable. And lucky for me after so long I'm able to not even hear it but every so often check back in to see if she's in need of a new diaper or decided that she is ready to eat. At ten o' clock I turned the light out, turned the volume up on the womb bear (who by the way I think really needs a name...hmmm?) and watched Oz. Random Vanessa Fact: I really like shows with a crime, investigative, prison theme. Such as: The First 48. 20/20 on WE. Gangland. It was around 11:30 when she finally went down for the count. There were a few times when I thought she had given in earlier but she was just plotting against me, with her eyes closed and that pretty lil' smile. As soon as I let my guard down she was back at it, crying inconsolably. And if you think that's where this persecution stopped you are sadly mistaken. She slept in two-hour chunks with a forty-five minute turn around (i.e. time spent getting her back to sleep).

At five a.m. I declared Elle the winner. The lights and television came on. Something was different though she wasn't bursting into tears and sending me to the brink of shedding my own. She was awake, taking in her surroundings (like she always does) and being the lovely lady I've spent the past fifty-seven days getting to know. I can't tell you how happy I was to see her for a second I thought I was going to have to find my receipt for a return and refund :) I wouldn't trade her for the world! Besides soon enough it'll be my turn to drive her mad. Until then...

XOXO